


In Which Laurence Insults a Dick

by Sophrederick



Category: Temeraire - Naomi Novik
Genre: Fluff, Insults, M/M, Party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:22:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24008050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sophrederick/pseuds/Sophrederick
Summary: Prompt: Laurence absolutely decimating a man while using the most polite language while the other captains are behind him absolutely losing it.
Relationships: William Laurence/Tenzing Tharkay
Comments: 12
Kudos: 88





	In Which Laurence Insults a Dick

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing a prompt from the Temeraire discord server, and then I remembered about this art:  
> https://turbolesbo.tumblr.com/post/181226966020/hey-everyone-its-been-2-and-a-half-years-and-this  
> And I got distracted and shippy

“That is an interesting viewpoint,” Laurence responded. “Due to my years in the Navy and now Aerial Corps, I find it difficult to ascribe to, or even understand, the thoughts of civilians. However I’m sure there is some merit to what you say.” Sir Richard, hearing what seemed like approval, geared up to explain and expand on his point. He was denied this chance.

“Pray tell, however did you come to such a, fascinating, conclusion? I would be most obliged to learn how an attorney perceives this issue. Perhaps you have had the pleasure of visiting the West Indies yourself, to observe?” Captain Granby was just able to keep a straight face, while Captain Berkley was forced to hide his snigger in a handkerchief. Captain Little exercised the better part of valor and made his excuses, but Captain Chenery showed no such compunction.

“Oh. Well, I confess I have not had the, ahem, pleasure of traveling there myself.” Sir Richard made then as if to justify his barbaric opinion some other way.

“I see. But the world is not so small as that. Have you then travelled to Portugal?” A negative nod. “Spain?” Another.

Chenery interjected as if to help Richard save face. “I think, Laurence, Sir Richard is one of those few who despite not having the opportunity for travel, which you and I have been afforded, has made efforts to better understand his knowledge of the world through the reports of others. Tell us sir, are you as I suppose a great reader?”

“Indeed sir, Temeraire should very much like to have an acquaintance with whom he can discuss his reading. I myself, prior to our partnership, profess myself to have been a poor reader. I spent many hours rather in the pursuit of society, and at cards.”

Little, having given up on the rest of the room, found entertainment where he may, and had returned to their circle. Having heard the gossip of Sir Richard’s sorry unwed state, and his own incompetence with matters of finance, Little knew him to be the sort of man who could ill afford to gamble away his money even in a friendly gave of whist. He elected to affect a side conversation with Berkley, to give him cover for his laughter. Granby’s amused reactions went unnoticed only due to poor observational skills.

There was a time when Laurence would have ceased his verbal attack and made amends, rather than an enemy. After having travelled the world, it was no longer that time.

“Would you by chance be inclined to join me at cards? I am certain we could find such gentlemen to form a respectable table. Unless you prefer to abstain for some reason?”

At this, Sir Richard had finally caught on to the fact that he was the butt of several jokes, and flushed with embarrassment. “No sir, and I wonder at your asking. I,”

“You wonder at my asking? Yes, and I wonder at your giving opinion so readily where you have no knowledge.” Laurence’s tone had finally crossed over from condescendingly polite to condescendingly disdainful, and Laurence could not have summoned Tharkay from the opposite end of the room better if he had cupped his hands and bellowed his name.

“I wonder at a man who calls himself Christian holding such reprehensible views of our duty to our fellow man. I have yet to meet a dragon, uneducated and unbaptized, whose thinking is not wholly superior to yours.” Where the other aviators had been reduced to unbecoming guffawing, Tharkay gazed upon Laurence in awe. That he could be present at the same time and place as such a man seemed a great and remarkable thing, though he gave away only a slight parting of his lips and widening of his eyes.

“And any dragon with even half your education is so far above you as to insult them by the comparison. Temeraire was not two years of age before he surpassed anything you could hope to achieve in the way of improvement. Although I suppose one such as yourself,” Laurence sneered at Richard’s being head to toe to indicate some glaring flaw, “must be satisfied with any improvement for which you have the means. Insignificant though it be.”

Sir Richard’s face was now red with rage rather than embarrassment. “I will not be spoken to this way! You,” Laurence interrupted him yet again, in a show of blatant disrespect.

“But you will. It is no more than you deserve, and quite possibly less than you should expect. You are stupid and small minded, and I have wasted enough time in your presence. I take my leave.” Laurence carefully turned such that his medals and sword shone, to remind the other man what he could expect should he be foolish enough to challenge a man with thirty years in two branches of military. He spared no more attention for the sputtering protestations of Richard, and was unsurprised to find Tharkay at his side and the other captains following him as he made his exit.

“The company at this gathering leaves something to be desired it would seem, but the night is young. Perhaps a smaller gathering at the covert?” Tharkay addressed this to Laurence, but looked questioningly behind him that the invitation would be understood to include more than just they two.

The smaller gathering was quite a bit more boisterous than the society event many of the aviators had been persuaded to attend. With so many still dressed so carefully, it was decided that to not continue in celebratory fashion could not be borne. Those who had not been invited to the dinner were gratified to hear of its dullness and regretful to hear of its drollness.

The story of Sir Richard’s evisceration was told, exaggerated, expounded upon, and declared to be mild in comparison with the insults aviators could and did sling at each other. Which they did, with great creativity and enthusiasm for the rest of the night.

Laurence, in light of his earlier temper, refrained from having more than a single glass of wine, despite numerous offers to the contrary. He looked forward to nursing his friends’ hangovers the next day. Laurence was able to also enjoy everyone else’s drunkenness with the quiet contentment of sobriety. Even Tharkay partook of a few glasses, which was a few glasses more than usual. What Laurence though to be quiet composure matching his own turned out to be the distracted fuzziness of one unaccustomed to drink.

Having noticed how much Tharkay had drank, Laurence turned to him in confusion. “Are you well? By my count you’ve had no more than three glasses of wine. Tenzing?” At his name, Tharkay jolted to the side in attention, and overcompensating, fell the few feet to the floor and lay there.

“I am. A terrible lightweight, you know. It’s why I so rarely drink, especially more than a little.” Tharkay found something frightfully amusing then, and stayed on the floor laughing.

Laurence’s quiet contentment lasted until Chenery pointedly used the word ‘boat’ one time too many. He knew no one would understand his lecture about the ship in question. He knew none of his fellow aviators would follow the explanation on a good day, but was unable to resist giving it anyway, to a more patient (drunk) than usual audience.

Laurence leaned forward and attempted to use hand gestures to communicate the parts of the Reliant with little success but much effort. Eventually tiring of the vacant confusion that his words met, he gave up and looked over to check on Tharkay, who was still on the floor but propped on his elbow watching the scene.

Tharkay wore that same look of fondness from earlier, and only smiled at his friend’s raised eyebrow. He lay on the floor softly drifting until his head came back to him, around the time people started to fall asleep where they sat or move toward beds and dragon clearings.

“Tenzing, wake up. I should be a poor friend if I allowed you to spend the night on the floor, and I doubt your back would forgive me.”

“Hmm, you and I both know I’ve slept in worse conditions with no complaint.” Tharkay got himself to a sitting position and accepted a hand up to stand. “But I suppose there’s no need just now.” Laurence debated the merits of attempting to make their way to the town house where they were staying, and merely took them to the first unused room with a bed he found.

Tharkay allowed himself to be led thus, and lay down on top of the covers to go back to sleep. When Laurence made to leave though, he frowned and grabbed his wrist.

“Lay down, Will. Let us count our blessings having found one unoccupied bed and not waste time in pursuit of another.” When Laurence would have argued and pulled away, Tharkay gently kissed his fingers. “Come sleep. We can talk in the morning.” He kissed another finger and closed his eyes.

In the face of such sweetness, Laurence lost any fight and removed their boots. Laying down in the scant space left, he let himself be pulled close enough to rest his head on Tharkay’s shoulder. He breathed deeply and relaxed as Tharkay kissed the top of his head and snuggled into place.

They dozed off then, both ready and eager for the conversation to come, long overdue. It would happen in the soft light of morning, and lovers’ embraces, but that was later. For now, they slept.


End file.
